~Reflections of Life~

Nothing but Shadows

2011-04-26T18:20:00.000-07:00

Shadows...

The flurry of days flying by

Hours swifter than a river

Catching moments like butterflies

What's real now, what's a lie?

Just shadows...

And there's nothing but

Hazy recollections cut

Recall and you might see

Clearly? I don't think you could be

Nothing but shadows...

Our past, our present

Dreams blur into reality

Dejavu, a sentimentality?

Or a cycle, a memory.

The past. The present. Everything.

All nothing but a shadow...

I SHALL REVIVE MY BLOG!!

2011-04-26T18:16:00.000-07:00

~~or rather...TRY to.~~

Borink-nezz

2009-03-19T19:58:00.000-07:00

So like....here i am again. sitting in a cafe...waiting....

...

hehe...n then i blog!

=)

of cuz ive got better things to do...assignments to finish...but i guess they all can wait. hehe...not really in the mood for assignments anyway =P but then again...when exactly DOES that mood come round?? lol

nowadays...each day just fades into the next, passing at a comfortable but busy pace, filled with classes and lectures and assignments and students to teach and....and....friends?? haha! yeahh...staying out on your own with frens as roommates and housemates has its pros and cons i suppose. but its definately not as fun as i imagined it to be. homecooked food, or rather, "Mummy-cooked" food definately tastes better compared to my attemps at making something edible for dinners or eating out at so-called "economy rice" shops...which aint economical at all nowadays believe me. hehe. oh welll...part of life as i know it now. housemates can be nusiances as well, especially if u live with girls who let food practically DECOMPOSE in the fridge or use ur mug to contain UNKNOWN, mysterious substances. hahaha...nope, im not embellishing my words. its for real...really. but they're all nice ppl other than their dirty habbits...so i dont suppose i should complain. hehe.

loosing weight has been an issue recently...and as most ppl see me, im skinny enough already. haha...probably a lack of delicious homecooked food to please my fussy little taste buds =P i guess all i can do is try to eat more when i get back home on the weekends. =) so far not really helping...oh well...thank God skinny girls nowadays are considered hot...i hope.

currently munching on a sandwhich and willing the calories to get distributed to RIGHT places....

its really noisy here...for a "high-class cafe". should go starbucks nxt time...but then theres the horrible parking problems in taipan...

well...seems ive run out of things to say....

becoming kinda dreamieeeee....

*sighh....far away in dreamland...*

Hugz n Kisses,

~Chella

Getting through each day
Living in every way
Dreaming of you as I pray
Our love will never fade away

A New LOOK!!

2009-03-14T03:10:00.000-07:00

Thanks to my beloved baby i got a brand new blog!!!

or maybe not...hehe...just a new LOOK for my blog

Thank you sayang!!

hehe...so hopefully ill blog more

maybe every day??

haha...impossible

twice a weeks more likely

hmmmm...

we'll see

=)

Life's rolling along...
A little less than perfectly
I just wish it was with you

Hugz n kisses...

~Chella~

2009-02-27T02:15:00.000-08:00

I am truly sorry...my dearest blog

You've been sadly neglected I'm afraid...

Which is good?? haha...since i only get inspiration to blog when im emo, not blogging for a long long time means i havent been emo for jz that amount of time =)

nope nope...does not mean im being emo right now...do i even SOUND emo?? hehe...jz bordom taking hold of me right now i suppose. sitting all alone in a cafe...with only my laptop for company... what else could i do but blog?? =) ~~study...but im so tired of studying~~ =P

Sooooo...lets start with my life. No.1 in line...college life?? its busy, busy, and MORE busy-ness. mid terms for my second semesters coming up next week n yes, im supposed to be studying right now but oh well...=) other than the busy-ness college lifes ok i guess...its tough but can be quite fun at times. just hv to get used to being tired aaaalllllllll the time. haha!

No.2?? errmmmm....love life?? hahaaa....nah...i dont think u wanna be reading mushy stories for the next 2 hrs or so. lets just say its going wayyy good...hehe *cheeky smile* just that it can be difficult being so far away from him...but im not complaining. i feel luckier than PLENTY of girls who have their bf's near them...=) and absence really truly makes the heart grow fonder...

next in line would be....hmmmm.....my music?? ahh...thats abit of a question mark right now. yes yes, of cuz im studying music in college right now...but it doesnt mean me n my music are doing just fine. maybe its jz a period where im finding myself again...in my music i mean. maybe ive been so busy all the passions fizzled out in the music i play. maybe all the technicalities involved somehow kill the soul of the music. maybe....i need a new violin! =P haaha!! i dunno really...its all just maybe's...

hmmmm...i really cant think what should be next in line. maybe ive been so "no-life" my life actually revolves around these 3 things only. haha. oh well...im satisfied. i dont need a million things to keep me happy. and i REALLLYYY should be getting back to studying right now.

Mid-terms are NOT to be flunked...never ever ever ever...

~~yes michelle, jz say that over n over n over again~~

bye bye bloggy...i dont know when ill be emo enough or free enough to type here again...

Hugz n kissies,

~Chella

Emo days are back...

2008-10-09T18:34:00.000-07:00

I've got back my urge to blog again

Nope, not really a good thing...

I don't understand why I feel this way

Everything worked out great

The timing's fabulous

Exactly the way I would have wanted it

Not a single day earlier...

So why can't I be happy??

Why must I be so selfish??

~~And so clingy??~~

Why....

I've become too dependent

Too reliant on changeable things

Now I have to learn again

The art of standing alone

~~Of being alone~~

Don't tell me you'll always be there

Its simply not possible

~~~

The change came just too soon

And too sudden

Caught me off guard

And don't tell me not to be like this
I'm sorry emotions can't be handled
Leave me be I'll be fine
I think

My poor poor blog....

2008-09-23T02:10:00.000-07:00

...has been painfully neglected indeed

awww...poor thing...

guess i've been just too busy

moonlighting??

sunlighting rather

plus college on top of that

or maybe its the lack of inspiration

a desperate lack of emo-ness

and ~~DRAMA~~

nope, don't miss it

life's nice as it is

enjoying it to the max

*contented sigh*

and now when I finally find the time to blog...

guess what??

I've got nothing to say

oh well...

I'll just be bored for the next couple of mins

watching him sleep...

he looks so peaceful

*sigh*

~~I love him~~

2008-05-11T18:43:00.000-07:00

The truest love that ever heart
Felt at its kindled core
Did through each vein, in quickened start
The tide of being pour

Her coming was my hope each day
Her parting was my pain
The chance that did her steps delay
Was ice in every vein

I dreamed it would be nameless bliss
As I loved, loved to be
And to this object did I press
As blind as eagerly

But wide as pathless was the space
That lay our lives between
And dangerous as the foamy race
Of ocean-surges green

And haunted as a robber-path
Through wilderness or wood
For Might and Right and Woe and Wrath
Between our spirits stood

The dangers I dared, I hindrance scorned
I omens did defy
Whatever menaced, harassed, warned
I passed impetuous by

On sped my rainbow, fast as light
I flew as in a dream
For glorious rose upon my sight
The child of Shower and Gleam

Still bright and on clouds of suffering dim
Shines that soft, solemn joy
Nor care I now, how dense and grim
Disasters gather nigh

I care not in this moment sweet
Through all I have rushed o'er
Should come on pinion, strong and fleet
Proclaiming vengeance sore

Though Haughty hate should strike me down
Right, bar approach to me
And grinding Might, with furious frown
Swear endless enmity

My love has placed her little hand
With noble faith in mine
And vowed that wedlock's sacred band
Our nature shall entwine

My love has sworn, with sealing kiss
With me to love- to die
I have at last my nameless bliss
As I love- loved am I

P/s---->> NOPE...i did not write this. hehe...i just found it really interesting and sweet while i was reading "JANE EYRE".

But soon...

2008-05-09T18:47:00.000-07:00

Seasons come
Faces go
Hours pass
Highs and lows

Seconds creep
Minutes crawl
Feelings wait
Behind the walls

Despair wakes
Loneliness drolls
Where is my love?
When will he call?...

But soon, but soon
My heart to wait
But soon, but soon
Loving arms will I await

But soon, but soon
His answer will ring
But soon, but soon
My beloved my pleas will bring

But soon, but soon
I will relish in his love
But soon, but soon
We'd be blissful as turtledoves

But soon, but soon...
Lonely heart do await

P/s--->> anyone up for some old-world charm?? haha...

the celebrity me

2008-04-29T01:47:00.001-07:00

MyHeritage: Celebrity Morph - Family history software - Descendents

pointless

2008-03-28T02:55:00.000-07:00

hmmm...so wat can i say?? haven't blogged in like AGES...got plenty of stuff to write bout but kinda much too soppy to blog about. hehe =P WHY u ask?? well...hmmm....nvm la. ignorance is bliss...if u really are THAT ignorant *tsk tsk tsk*. haha!

lifes going at a comfortable pace. more ups than downs. busy enough to keep me occupied and boring enough to give me lotsa hang out time. hehe...jealous?? too bad =P

so then...what was i talking about again?? hmmm...dont remember my point anymore. hehe! nvm, ill blog again when i remember wat i wanted to say. gtg now...laterz!!

*hugz n kisses*
~Chella~

La-la-nezzz???

2008-03-02T18:48:00.000-08:00

goshhh....haha!! whats becoming of me??? *reminder to myself: never never EVER stick out two fingers on each hand again*

Valentines....

2008-02-15T04:55:00.000-08:00

....is OVERRATED

ahhh!! before u guys get out the big guns and kill me...do let me explain will you?? haha...

Valentines as a day for love is all good...i mean, its one time you can appreciate that special someone and all. very nice, very nice. The only thing I cant stand is seeing it so so commercialized nowadays. everythings especially expensive...flowers are TWICE the price, restaurants put all effort to "cut throat", etc. Its a crazy world...where something so romantic could be used for business purposes.

U know what??!! I should have valentines on the 13th instead!! avoid all the crowds n crazy prices...yeahhh....hehe. (To that someone-->> what do u think?? =P) or maybe the 15th would do too...hmmm...

Anywayz, all the criticisms aside, I really did have a nice nice time last night. Everything was so...ermm...traditionally romantic. haha!! I dunno how else to put it. It was flowers, movie, dinner...the whole package. The best part was of course the person I shared the night with...hehe. (everyone go "awwwwwww....") My 1st valentine date ever....*wide smile* definitely a night to remember...*dreamy look*

haha!! so I better get going before I get lost in dreamland...hope u guys had an amazing last night too =)

*hugz n kisses*
~~chella~~

(so then, is "elle" or "chella" nicer?? hehe...let me know pleaseee)

Happy CNY everyone!!!!!!!!!

2008-02-10T02:59:00.000-08:00

yupyup...its that time of the year again. and i think i definitely put on at least 2 kgs just over the weekend...aikzz...*faints*. hehe, oh well...ill have the rest of the year to work it off. =P no biggie...

~~~~

somehow this chinese new year's been kinda quiet...not much going on. just the extra eating of cuz...hehe. other than that nothing special happened. hmmm...and i dont suppose anything else special is gonna happen anytime soon either. life is somehow settling into a comfortable, nice routine. with enough changes to keep me sane, yet enough of a routine to keep me grounded. haha!! yeah, i guess i could put it that way. hmmm...wait a min...

Could I live like this the rest of my life???!!

okayyyy...that was random. kindly ignore...hehe. but yeah, if this is a fore-shadow of what the rest of my life holds, eg. my job, my family, my whatever........me like it =) oh well, God has plans. if only i had a sneak peak =P

~~~~

Valentines is just around the corner...*wide smile* probably the 1st valentines day im actually looking forward to. hehe, yeahh...i was THAT pathetic. nows different. HOW u ask?? go find out urself if your actually THAT blurr...haha!!

~~~~

I feel old...like...OLD. only got 3 more years of teen life. goshh...but...come to think of it, its pretty young comparatively. STILLL....i wanna stay 17 forever!!!!!!!!!!! -->>mmhmm...impossible i know *knocks herself on the head*<<--

~~~~

okok...i better go before my thoughts run away with me =) have a nice nice fat fat happy happy CHINESE NEW YEAR everyone!!!

*hugz n kisses*
~~elle~~

(could i please pleasee change my nickname?? i never really liked "mich" =P)

Pretty little star

2008-01-22T20:50:00.000-08:00

Pretty little star I see
So bright in the clear dark sky
Won't you please grant me a single wish
Just one from your perch so high

Let this last forever
Just this moment alone
Magically bathed in pale moonlight
Tucked away in the darkness of the night

Let this last forever
Safe in the arms I love
No thought of shadows that cloud my days
All my worries melt in love's pure gaze

Let this last forever
If forevers what it's gonna take
To satisfy a longing I can never comprehend
To overcome an addiction I could never understand

So let this last forever
Pretty little star so high
Cuz there's no where else I would rather be
Than here in my love's arms tonight

P/s---->> soppy-nezz alert!!! haha...sorry ppl...read too many mushy stories.

Treasure Time

2008-01-08T18:01:00.000-08:00

If only every minute
Could seem like a lifetime
And every little second
Would be like forever

If only the clock
Ticked a wee bit slower
And I could keep time
Hidden like precious treasure

If only the hours
Didn't fly with wings away
And every single moment
Lasted like years this way

But that could never happen
Time was meant to be
Treasured like greatest of treasures
Which stops for no man, not me

2008-01-06T19:23:00.000-08:00

I'm...

...ermmm...

~~scared~~

unsure

though I shouldn't be

got mixed feelings

happy and excited ~~for someone~~

yet somehow...

I don't even know what I'm feeling

worried maybe

trying not to hold on too tight

or be too clingy

but I can't help it

~~I'm emotional~~

I knew this would come sooner or later...

I guess I was hoping for later

The new year came too soon

~~~~

But I'll be happy

~~Even if I have to hide my feelings~~

I'll smile

~~Just for you~~

Don't worry, I'll live

pure nonsense

2008-01-04T05:01:00.000-08:00

I'm bored

Feel like blogging

But blog about what???

Good question, Michelle

hmmm...

blog about New Year's Eve??

nahh, nothing much happened

Christmas??

even less happened...nahhh...

errr...

I can't think

SO can't think

my heads somewhere else

no, i think my HEARTS somewhere else

don't ask where

floating in the clouds maybe

or buried six feet under??

hmmm...floatings more like it

whatever

I'll go watch tv instead

and wait till my inspiration comes next then only I'll blog

no point cracking my head now

btw, is it still in place??

my head I mean

wait

I'm rambling right??

pure crap

aikzz... Michelle, just disappear

byeee!!

*poof*

*disappears in a puff of smoke*

Last day of 2007!!!

2007-12-30T17:53:00.000-08:00

yeahhh!! the new year is just a few hours away!! ermmm...more accurately around 14 hours away actually but well...hehe.

SOOooo...how was the whole of 2007?? it'll definitely be a year to remember thats for sure. especially the last quarter. hehe...for certain reasons. it was full of surprises...pleasant surprises. and yes, i finally got my taste of teenage freedom!!! ahhh...sweeeeet...haha!! my drivers license finally happened, after long years of longing and dreaming. my year of bumming around was more productive than I expected. my brain is slowly rusting in certain parts...like the maths section for example (7+9 is what again?? did u say 16?? =P). I learnt to handle situations better. Had my heart broken less. Tried to bury my dreams and wishes, only to find that I'm nothing without them. Totally gave up on love and romance, only to have it pop up right in front of me unexpectedly. Like a jack-in-a-box.

You know how the end of something usually makes the lasting impression??? so 2007 was alot of things...scary, sad, boring, sweet, lovely, interesting, emo, and plenty else. but the last and most lasting impression of 2007 is only one thing...surprising. VERY surprising. so I guess if anyone asks, "how was your year??", I could only say one thing....SUPRISING!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!

Tag #2

2007-12-16T03:11:00.001-08:00

so well....since I still got nothing to do lets clear up this pile of tags shall we?? =) sorry pauline!! i know uve tagged me like...4 mths ago n now only im doing it. haha!! better late den never??

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1. The tag victim has to come up with 8 different points about his/her perfect lover.
2. Have to mention the gender of his/her perfect lover.
3. Tag eight other victims to join this game and leave a comment on their blog.
4. If you are tagged the second time, there is NO need to do this again.
5. Lastly, and most importantly, HAVE FUN DOING IT.

errr...gender?? I'm definately STRAIGHT...so a guy of cuz. haha...

#1. a sensitive guy...who knows how I feel without me having to spell it out for him. hehe...like, he'll know when I'm annoyed, or upset, or happy, or even sad but trying to hide it. i find it sweet =)

#2. romance would definitely sweep me off my feet for sure...lol. call me corny, but if a guy comes with roses n all I'll just melt =P but of cuz must have some sorta limit la...too much of mushy-ness does get kinda choking sumtimes.

#3. a person i can talk to...have nice conversations with. be able to relate to...talk on and on about nothing in particular. haha...in other words, my lover would be my best friend as well.

#4. ...and also we could just be together saying nothing in particular...hehe. without that awkward silence that happens with some ppl...silence is golden. sometimes =)

#5. physically...i don't have many requirements. a nice height...TALLER den me of cuz. haha!! n a nice nose =P don't ask me whats with the noses...i just notice peoples noses. LOL. n decent looking of cuz...i know its whats inside that counts. but i wanna have a boyfriend i could actually be proud of...not some frog looking guy. goshh...im so bad. hehe...

#6. a person who trusts me enough not to get jealous over lil things...like me giving friendly hugs to other guy friends and stuff like that. n i cant stand over-possessive/ over-protective guys who think they OWN you =.=" totally pisses me off...

#7. a good kisser?? haha....i sound notty. *cheeky smile* but well...my guy definitely has to know how to hold me and show affection rite??

#8. last but not least, someone who loves me just the way I am. and thinks I'm still beautiful without make-up and all messed up, like when i jz get out of bed in the mornings...haha. (everyone go "awwwwww...")

hmmm...come to think of it ive got one last point...lol

#9. a guy i can rely on... strong, not physically muscular la (tho that wud b a bonus...hehe), but strong in character. not a wimp or a momma's boy...or a coward

Tag #1

2007-12-16T02:33:00.000-08:00

OK!!! Lee En and Sean...i'm FINALLY doing this. haha!! goshh...cant believe I'm really doing tags...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1. Do this tag and answer all the questions in your own blog.
2. Delete question no.20 and add one of your own question instead.
3. Tag 8 victims to do this tag.

Questions:

1. What is your dream when you were a small kid?
hmmm...to see snow!! =P n to become a pianist...forgot wat else

2. What is the happiest thing in your whole life?
right now?? hehe...i cant tell u. it'll be such a dead give-away *cheeky smile* but im happy...really =)

3. What do you wish to have right now?
err...dinner. nice new heels. good grades for my diploma exam tomoro. lots of christmas pressys wud b nice too...hehe

4. When is the last time you horse laughed?
horse laughed?? do horses laugh?? *wonders*

5. What did you realize recently?
dreams come true ^^

6. Which bad habit in you that is the most unacceptable?
taking forever getting ready to go out =P

7. When you are unhappy, what will you do?
depends wat kinda unhappy. either i call a fren n talk my feelings out, or throw myself on my bed n sob my heart out, or watch a movie/ go shopping to forget

.8. What are you afraid of losing?
people i love...THINGS included, my handphone for example =P

9. Within 5 years, which target is the most realistic one?
degree in music?? maybe?? hopefully??

10. When you met someone that you like, will you profess or hide your feeling?
profess la...only people in soap operas go around with feelings under cover. den regret it later on =.=" so stupid...

11. List out 3 kind of people you hate the most.
sluts, L.O.A (lack of attention) people, bitches n bastards

12. Define loneliness.
being empty with nothing and no one to love...even in a crowd of ppl

13. Are you satisfied with your life now?
yupyup... currently going better den expected. lol

14. When is the most recent time you felt touched?
goshhh...i cant remember!!

15. Where is the most beautiful place that you've visited?
phuket's beaches, niagara falls, michigan's countryside in de autumn

16. A song that is playing in your mind recently.
hmmm..."baby love" by...i forgot who. hehe

17. If you have a wish to come true, what is it?
pass my diploma well n get into Uni

18. Do you have anything to be worried or scared recently?
duhhh....exam tomoro =S n also next yr...

19. If the world is going to end, what will you do?
pray...say my i love yous and im sorrys to my frens n all...den go on praying =P

20. What do you want for Christmas??
all i want for christmas is my two front teeth, my two front teeth, my two front teeth...oops, i already got my two front teeth!! haha...lame...sorry!

I wanna tag....NO ONE!! cuz I'm a nice person and i don't pass tags around =P hehe...

2007-12-12T18:56:00.000-08:00

AHhhhh....I've got piles and piles of tags not done. STOP TAGGING ME!!! haha...=P

But as Lee En would say...probably I should just get started on them then I wouldn't have piles anymore...hehe. I will...soon...SOMETIME soon *cheeky smile*

Who cares

2007-12-11T21:21:00.000-08:00

So many questions
Too little answers
So many wonderings
That's left unanswered

But none of that matters
When I'm in your arms
Kiss my fears all away
And I'm left under your charms

Who cares what the future brings
As long as I'm with you
I see my reflection in your eyes
And I believe all you say is true

Who cares what the years bring
I'll worry only where its due
Lets let it be, whatever it will be
As long as I'm with you

What happened??

2007-12-06T17:03:00.000-08:00

What happened to the magic?
The star struck feeling in your eyes
What happened to the butterflies?
That were fluttering about in disguise

What happened to midnight kisses?
And fantasies of what could be
What happened to love's deep spell?
What happened to you and me?

It never lasts forever
Romance is but a word
One minute you're up in heaven
The next you're eating dirt

This is reality
I know reality holds true
But I hoped we were different
And I thought that I knew...

...What happens to star struck magic
It just fades away
What happens to butterfly kisses
They disappear one fine day

What happens to golden fantasies
Little goblins come to steal
What happens to lovers' spells
They're broken like pirate deals

But one thing I don't understand
The thing I can't believe to be
Cuz we were just so perfect
Darling, what happened to you and me??

P/s--->> ahhh...it turned out so sad and pessimistic. haha...and soppy too!! =P no worries, i totally dont feel that way =)

2007-11-28T18:53:00.000-08:00

Hi GOD...you there???

Are you still there???

heeloooooo....?

Can you hear me??

*crickets chirping*

*silence*

Halooooo????

*Halo alooo alooooooo....(echoes)*

Guess its my fault

Woopss...

My bad

Now what do I do??

I'm in deep sh*t ain't I??

*sigh*

Determination

2007-11-25T17:11:00.000-08:00

A bit of talent
A pinch of inspiration
A drop of goal and dream
The rest is sheer determination

The desire to produce beauty
In every note thats played
The desire to hear bounty
In every bow thats laid

But its my determination
That has to see me through
More than drive to succeed
I need more heart to get me through

So give me more courage
The confidence to achieve
Give me strength of soul and will
And faith so I'll believe

God help me

2007-11-17T02:57:00.000-08:00

well now...what can I say??

life's good

some parts better than I ever imagined

or dreamed

or dared to hope

it makes the other sucky parts of life less sucky

a LOT less I must say

so I'm thankful

there's nothing more I can wish for

oh yeahh...

except to pass my violin exam that is

thats my only wish for now

cuz as for the rest of my dreams

they're all coming true

for real

unbelievable??

believe it

~~~~

~~I actually can't believe it myself~~

~~~~

people ask, "how are you? how's life??"

for ONCE I can say and actually mean it...

"I'm good...and life's great"

=)

2007-11-02T17:43:00.000-07:00

eeekkk....!!

My blogs dying out

Like seriously

My inspiration with it too

W.T.H

But anyway...

I was jz wondering...

Why does everything in life feel like a temporary high??

When nothing ever lasts

And nothing ever satisfies

Not for long enough at least

And when the "high's" gone

All that's left is a gaping hole

An emptiness

Deep inside

Which drives you to look for something more

Something

Anything at all

To fill that void

But nothing ever does

~~Nothing~~

..
..
..
..
..

Yes I'm repeating myself I know

Forgive me

I'm emo-ing

2007-10-22T19:16:00.000-07:00

So there...

Im back to reality with a bump

*ouchhh...*

Reality with all its problems

And difficulties

And other whatnots

Couldn't stay in dreamland forever I guess

If only

Hmmm...

Oh well

Reality's looking good too

Not as bad as expected??

And reality definitely feels more natural

Not all rainbows and flowers

And dreamy in-the-cloud feelings

It feels REAL

Hmmm...

You know what??

My hearts beating again

Yeah, I think its still there

For sure

I thought it got frozen

No, I didn't think that

It DID freeze over

Either that or it got lost in transition

Or was it...??

Err...

Nevermind that

Its back now

=)

Should I think twice?
My heart is mine to give
Ooops...I think its too late
Nevermind
It should be safe this time
*big smile*

Tell me I'm not dreaming

2007-10-17T23:24:00.000-07:00

Of rainbows and roses
Of butterflies and blossoms
Whirlwind romances and fairy tales
New found lovers and open bosoms...

Tell me I'm not dreaming
When I find me in your arms
Tell me that its for real
Every kiss and every glance

Cuz its too good to be true
Every time I look at you
Reality feels so far away
I can't believe you're here to stay

Do illusions come true??
Please please tell me, do
Do wishes come to pass??
Somebody, please tell me fast

So tell me I'm not dreaming
When I find me in your arms
Tell me its all for real
Every kiss and every glance

~~~

I'm hoping its for real
Every second spent with you
For once, life's so surreal
Just tell me that its true

P/s---->> this is de by-product of too many romance novels...turns ur insides all mushy. haha!! NOT inspired by personal experience...

Love Has Dawned

2007-10-15T22:24:00.000-07:00

The sun sifts through the clouds
Warming me to my toes
Crawling over the horizon
Its rays break over my soul
I feel pleasant warmth
Rushing through me...

A tiny little ray of light
Pierces through the darkness of night...

Oh, what bliss!
Oh, what heavenly delight!
Love has come to rescue me,
Like the sun redeems the lonely night.

Beautiful love courses through my veins
Setting my heart pumping at the speed of light
Warm shivers tingle up my spine
Right to my lips, where a smile plays unendingly bright

My heart is about to burst
My soul soars with the birds...

I am HAPPY
For the first time since I fell into pain's icy grip

I now know for sure...

Love has dawned
Clear on the inmost recesses of my heart
Pushing away the hurt
Mending the brokenness...

Indeed,
Love has dawned

P/s--->> i dug out one of my poems from my old blog jz for the fun of it...hehe. maybe, jz maybe it describes exactly what I'm feeling now. err...i said MAYBE ok?? haha. Dun go jumping into conclusions =P

2007-10-07T01:38:00.000-07:00

hehehe~

*big big smile*

its nothing

=P

really...its nothing

*cheeky smile*

ahhhh...

oh crap

I look ridiculous smiling at the computer screen

But who cares

Cuz I don't

=)

~~~~~~~~

Smile
And the world smiles with you
Laugh
And everyone would stare at you

But do it anyway...

Long Gone

2007-10-02T17:52:00.000-07:00

No, Im not loosing it
Im still kinda sane
What I'm telling you is serious
Don't say it sounds so lame

You can't make up your mind
And I can't wait longer, so its fine
Cuz I don't think you would ever call
I'm not waiting just staring at the wall

Its my life
Its mine to live
I'm not waiting around
Like some dirty dead leaf

So I've now decided...

Enough of this
I'm not waiting for you
I'm sick of this
Now its time to tell you

A minute too long
This 5 words I've borne
When you make up your mind
Baby, I'll be long gone

Yes, I've made up my mind
Baby, I'll be long gone

2007-09-30T19:25:00.000-07:00

Its a Monday!!! again...

But at least today's Monday is different...kinda

I don't feel like hibernating

Or moping in my room

Weirdly, what i really feel like doing is...is...errr....

What do I feel like doing??

Cant put it in words exactly...hehe

But nvm...point is, i feel kinda good

For a Monday that is =)

Guess wat?? its a RAINY monday at that

Amazing why I still feel good

But I'm not gonna try to figure my "feel good" feeling right now

I'll just enjoy feeling good 1st...while it lasts

Later I'll figure it ^^

God knows I don't feel like this every day

Heck...i hvnt felt like this in AGES

AEONS maybe

Anyway

The world's a happy place

Cuz I'm happy

*big smiley face*

A heart of stone

2007-09-26T23:03:00.000-07:00

Give me a heart of stone
For just a minute a day
I need to feel numbness set in
Merciful numbness from within

A heart of stone
To dry the tears
To numb the pain
Collected from years

A heart of stone
Immune to hurt
Free from ties
That bind me to dirt

A heart of stone
Maybe for just a day
Then I may be truly free
Who cares what people say?

An Illusion of You

2007-09-16T19:13:00.000-07:00

In my dreams we've kissed
Only a thousand times before
In my dreams I've held
You close like never before

In my dreams you were perfect
The way you were supposed to be
Then I awoke and saw the truth
My dreams were never meant to be

'Twas just an illusion
That never came to pass
Wishes of a daydreamer
That fade way too fast

Cuz you were standing there
Right before my eyes
Yet you turned away from me
Your goodbye as cold as ice

The reality is this
This reality is true
All along I've loved
An illusion of you

~~

The illusion I wished
Was just to be loved by you
The illusion I faked
And hoped upon hope to be true

But now I see...

The reality is this
This reality is true
I've loved nothing but
An illusion of you

Its all nothing but
My illusion of you...

2007-09-10T19:25:00.000-07:00

I don't care

I don't care

No, seriously

I DON'T CARE!!!

I jz wish I could convince myself
that I really don't care

But I can't

should have seen it coming

there was no other way out

stupid me

~~

My hearts on my sleeve
Where else do I put it?
Locked away, in a high tower
Or buried, where no one could find it

My hearts on my sleeve
Easily broken in two
I shouldn't leave it for time to fix
I'm gonna hide it, and throw the key too

~~

I really wish I didn't care
Of the fact that I thought you cared

But you don't

Stupid, dumb ass me

P/s-->> jz emo-ing... dun mind me

I used to believe...

2007-09-08T02:12:00.000-07:00

I used to believe
In fairy tales
Prince and princesses
Golden eggs and unicorn tails

I used to believe
The world was fine
A beautiful place to live in
But now I see I was blind

I used to believe
Good reigns over bad
Heroes will rush to save the day
Villains will never have the last say

I used to believe
Love is a special thing
That it would triumph over hate
That soul mates were brought by fate

I used to believe
Dreams always come true
And I was almost right
The moment I found you

I used to believe
Love lasts forever
And I also believed
When you said forever

That I shouldn't have
The biggest mistake I made
It is my fault I know
I believed everything you said

Now I don't believe
In fairy tales
Good seldom wins
Love's a long lost tale

I don't believe
The world's a perfect place
Dreams never do come true
And guess what??

I don't believe in you

~~

I only believe
What I know to be true
Hearts can always be mended
Though mine was broken by you

P/s---->> original idea from pauline....thanks girl!!

2007-09-05T01:00:00.000-07:00

update??

okok...update

ermm...update

hmmm...

*thinking*

**thinking real hard**

***bangs head on table***

welllll...nothings coming

sorry

or rather I should say sorry to myself really

not cause I got nothing to blog about

jz other reasons

reason u don't wanna know bout

no, really...u wouldn't wanna know

why did I think you WOULD actually wanna know in the 1st place??

ahhh...my bad

hmmm...

I feel like eating something

cold, sweet

oh yeah, i already ate ice cream

forgot

maybe i should go eat more

or maybe not

too fat already

wait... I'm not fat

last I remembered I was kinda skinny

right???

hmmmm....

what day izzit today??

Monday??

cuz it sure feels like one

no no, its a Wednesday

and it isn't the least bit gloomy

surprising

I thought moods were affected by weather

apparently not

cuz its so damn bright and sunny out there

whatever

I'll pretend I don't care

you know what?

I think I think too much

and in the end I get so disappointed

cuz things don't usually go the way I figure

lemme re-phrase that

things NEVER go the way I figure

but thats another thing I'll pretend not to care bout

shall I??

so yeah...

I DON'T CARE

ok??

done??

fine??

satisfied??

*sigh*

what the heck

I'm talking to myself

again

*michelle slaps herself*

now I shall get the heck outta here

go collect my scattered brains

laterzz

2007-08-26T18:41:00.000-07:00

What the heck was I expecting anyway??

Like seriously...

I feel so damn stupid

Making the same mistakes

Over and over again

Disappointing myself...

But guess it's all my fault

I shouldn't have expected anything

Cuz theres nothing anyway

I'm nothing to you

Why did you make me think otherwise??

**sigh**

P/s--->> dont even TRY to figure wth I'm saying here...aint that sure myself

Baby, take your pick

2007-08-21T19:05:00.000-07:00

Been waiting up all night
Wondering whats on your mind
You've got me puzzled, my dear
Clear my thoughts? Would you be so kind?

What do you really want?
Where are we meant to go?
All I get are mixed signals
Jumping about to and fro

Do you really want me?
Sometimes seems like you don't
Yet other times you do adore me
But sometimes seems like you won't

I so don't get it
Confused without a clue
Do you want me? Gotta let me know
I'm not waiting around, I'm not here for show

So tell me now
Baby, tell me quick
Maybe I'll wait awhile
Baby, take your pick

Glimmer of a hope

2007-08-20T19:31:00.000-07:00

Dreaming
I think I should stop
Been wishing
And waiting until I could drop

Cuz in the end
Do dreams ever come true?
Tell me, my friend
What are wishes to you?

To me they are...

Empty promises
Blatant tricks of mind
Nothing but guesses
About a future thats so blind

Call me a pessimist
Call me such a bore
That I'd rather be than a romanticist
With empty wishes knocking my door

I've learned the hard way
Believe me when I say so
My dreams I've all but locked away
Leaving for the winds of time to blow

~~~~

But yet somethings missing
An urge inside of me
The need for a dream to carry me through
The glimmer of a hope that I once knew

Freaking out!!!

2007-08-13T22:07:00.000-07:00

Soooooooooo........de exams gonna be way harder den i thought. oops sorry...VIOLIN exam i mean. *sighhh* For the 1st time in my life i actually practiced till my fingers are red raw and my neck has a mark that looks very suspiciously like a hickey~ from holding the violin too long mind u...not making out in the bushes~ But no matter how much i practice no one can guarantee me a pass. dang those stupid diploma exams!! actually...dang stupid exams(in general)!!

But i guess practicing my butt off does help to a certain degree. so off i go...to practice till my fingers fall off. or my head is permanently angled strangely. or my eyes pop out from straining to read little "taugeh" notes. however you want to put it. makes no difference to me =)

Freaking out
I can't see the way
How do I pass??
Practicing my butt off each day

I really need a miracle
Lord, give me a sign
In the form of a nice big "A+"
Or a "99%" I wouldn't mind

...

2007-08-07T20:07:00.000-07:00

I felt it

Finally

My heart was racing

The feeling so intense

Emotions were flying

Sending tingles down my spine

The passion was beautiful

Charging the air around me

I closed my eyes

Living in that moment

Forever, if only

But I couldn't hold on

Had to let it go

~~~

Nope, I'm not in love

And NO, its not what your thinking (don't be dirty!!)

So what was I doing??

**ahem ahem**

I was practicing my violin =P

I made ~for the 1st time~ real MUSIC

Cuz I didn't just play

I FELT

True music of the heart

2007-08-06T18:53:00.000-07:00

and THAT jz about sums me up...=)

Sorry for the lack of new posts lately. Been rather bz and low on inspiration these days. But I'll be back with lotsa new poems to post up soon...i HOPE. Foresee I'll be M.I.A the rest of the week sooooo....miss me ok?? haha =P

--->>hugz n kisses<<---

Whats up???

2007-08-01T19:17:00.000-07:00

this is what's up!! its a musical which actually doesnt hv very much to do with Tunku himself. which is ironic but...hehe. anywayz, the storyline is great, the music is great, the dancing is great, and so is the singing. haven't really got the whole story yet so i cant give a synopsis. kinda hard to concentrate on the music sheets in front of me and the drama itself at the same time...but i know its good 4 sure =)

the opening night is on the 11th August and it goes on till 2nd September. awfully long time rite?? haha...so u got no excuse to catch it =P tickets are not that expensive...forgot exactly how much though. hmmm...u know what?? just go to the website n check it out la. easier that way...lol --->>KLPac's website<<--- oh yea, its a KLPac production btw.

if u need more info I'm alwayz here *wide smile*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

life has been pretty normal so far. been bz with that "Tunku" thing. every night rehearsal u noe... haihhzz...but it aint that bad actually. hehe..we still do hv fun with the hard work. like lately we've been bringing lots n lots of chocolates n candy n MENTOS. and having a nice nice picnic there (though we're not supposed to be eating backstage...*shhhhhh!!!*) hahaha. so its all good...still tiring though. one fine day when i do remember to bring my cam I'll go get some candid shots to post up here. den u can c how skilled we are at playing a violin and popping M&M's into our mouths AT THE SAME TIME. yup, its definitely possible. when theres a will, theres a way... *cheeky smile*

got to run now...will update when i find time to think

--->>signing off<<---

2007-07-29T19:07:00.001-07:00

Its a rainy Monday...again

funny how moods are usually affected by the weather

but rainy Mondays are the worst

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

well...u probably noticed i hvnt been updating my blog much. dats cuz i realized ive probably written at least one poem for each and every topic thats close to heart. which in turn, doesnt leave me much more to write about at all. so i'll rather not write anything than run the risk of repeating myself. I NEED INSPIRATION!!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

so tell me why do I feel this way??

Imagine

2007-07-24T02:19:00.000-07:00

Imagine myself away
Far from this crazy life
To somewhere over the rainbow
Without any troubles or strife

Imagine myself away
To where wishes do come true
A place no one would ever know
Fantasies my heart believe are true

Imagine, just imagine
And I could reach the sky
Bring the moon back from its place
Just imagine, and I could fly

Imagine, just imagine
And I could float with clouds
Touch the stars and take one back
Just imagine, and have no doubts

Imagine, only imagine
All my problems away
I'm myself, for once a change
Imagine, and there'll always be a way

Imagine
Just imagine

P/s--->> the idea for this post is taken from pauline. go check out her blog for the original --->>click here<<---

Here by the phone

2007-07-23T04:09:00.000-07:00

You haven't called
I'm still here by the phone
Been eating my heart out
Waiting for that little tone

Why am I doing this?
Breaking my own heart this way
I already know the answer to this
Been thinking about you all day

You and me wouldn't work
I knew it from the start
Even before you said the first hello
I knew you would break my heart

Kept my mouth shut anyway
And tried to wish the jinx away
Now I know it didn't do much good
Since now I know whatever should I do?

You still haven't called
And I'm still here by the phone
Nothing left of my heart to eat out
Just waiting for that little tone

P/s--->> i know wat ur thinking..."Michelle's getting awfully repetitive n loosing her poetic inspiration" rite?? well...guess wat?? ur RIGHT!! haha

Thank God...FINALLY!!!

2007-07-19T23:11:00.001-07:00

I PASSED MY DRIVING TEST!!!!!!!!!!
and I'm nearly jumping for joy...hehe

so yeahhh...after hours of melting and/or baking in a lil white kancil, waiting around in steaming "pondoks", listening to approx. 10 hours of total crap, not to mention plenty of blood, sweat, and tears ~(weellll...maybe not the blood and tears part...but u get the idea)~ i got this little card thingy with my picture and name on it. and oh yeah, my address too!! but to me its my TICKET TO FREEDOM!!!!! to think that all my life...ever since i could remember, i have looked upon this day as the day of my independence. the day I will break free from all rulers and all rules. the day I will declare my freedom to the world. the day that...that...~cuts it short~// its my MERDEKA...MERDEKA!! *dreamy look* sighhhhhh...*snaps out of it* hahaha...excuse mua...jz being dramatic =P

so the point is...I CAN DRIVE!! i mean like...legally of cuz. haha. the test wasnt that bad...besides the fact that it was freaking hot and i had to wait for God knows how long...it wasnt bad at all. the best part is i actually passed everything. with not bad marks actually. hehe...was so scared i wud flunk and hv to retake the whole stupid thing again. the JPJ officer guy was kinda friendly...so that was good. n i didnt knock any poles during my parking test. n i didnt roll down the hill on that "naik bukit" thingy. so IT WAS ALL GOOD. hahaha...n I'm SO done with the freaking stupid learning driving system. *wohhoooooo!!!*

anybody needs a lift anytime??? stranded on some deserted road with no transport?? need to get somewhere on an emergency?? no prob!! jz call me =) hahaha...
(wait a min...I'm jz joking ok?? lol)

gonna go test out my new found freedom now...wish me luck!! hopefully i dont end up in hospital or my car on the back of a tow truck. *God forbid* hehe...

WATCH OUT MALAYSIA!!! MICHELLE'S LOOSE ON THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!

Till later-->> hugz n kisses =)

Saturday morn

2007-07-13T19:47:00.001-07:00

Looking gorgeous
On a Friday night
I thought I had lotsa fun
Was out partying all night

Admit I flirted a lil
Had a few drinks with friends
Tried to dance my troubles away
But God knows troubles never end

That was then
And this is now...

I'm all alone
With only myself to blame
Staring at my own reflection
Yet I'm hating the same

The make-up is gone
So is the smile I put on
My eyes are dimmed with tears of shame
I know deep inside I got no one else to blame

The mask is off
And I'm so empty inside
I wonder what happened to
All the fun I had tonight

There's nothing left
But tears streaming down my face
There's nothing left
Not a single sign, not a little trace

I'm gorgeous no more
Early on a Saturday morn
My eyes are red, my heart's so dead
Am I supposed to greet the lovely dawn?

Yet tonight I'll do the same
Put on my make-up, play on my game
Looking for more, I'll search on each day
Don't care how or where, I'll find it some way

P/s---->> inspiration definitely ain't personal experience ok?? lol

Golden Girls

2007-07-10T18:46:00.000-07:00

Hello world!
How do you do?
Know what "Golden Girls" are?
Here's some of the basic rules

Welllllll......

We never screw up
We're not allow to
We must always be good
No exceptions, thats the rule

Prim and proper
Thats the way to go
Go crazy and hyper??
No way!! That's a big no no

No alcohol
And definitely no tattoos
Don't even think of clubs and pubs
Just the word itself is taboo

No skirts above the knee
We can only dream about midriffs
Jeans must never be tight or a fit
Baggy's best, that should do it

No more than 2 piercings
One on each ear I mean
We don't have curfews, are you surprised?
That's cuz we're never out...talk about deprived!!

That's just the basic rules
Haven't even got started
But we the Golden Girls know
The last rule's our target

Its the same as the first
Just put in different words
Its says, "Never ever ever screw up"
Wrong that, and you whole life's up!!

~~~~~~

But now I'm breaking free
I'll be Golden Girl no more
Cuz I'm no angel
And I'm no saint
I wanna be who I am
Definitely not perfect, that I ain't

P/s--->> dramatized as usual =P so dont go take it literally....

Im so dead tired...

2007-07-08T06:28:00.000-07:00

so so so dead tired. So wat am I doing here blogging?? good question. very good question...

Probably cuz my life's a mess. or maybe just some parts of it. nothing is ever what it appears to be rite?? yeap...I'm a living example. or on second thought...its not my life thats in a mess. its just my head. n im sitting here right now to sort my thoughts out. but what am i actually thinking?? i have NO idea. isn't that just FANTASTIC??? *sarcastic*

so yeahh...I'm not stressing...so it can't be that. got nothing in particular to stress about. It cant be friendship problems...kinda got immune to that awhile ago. Its not any RELATIONSHIP problems...the closest thing I have to a boyfriend is my DOG. sad ain't it?? actually its not sad at all...funner being single. anywayz, back to the point. so what is it?? whats making me sit here when I'm so dead tired already? Most probably its the need to sort my thoughts. But what thoughts am I thinking that need to be sorted?? Its so totally muddled up there (in my head) I cant even figure my own thoughts. how lame is that?? so wait....where was I again?? what was my point?? nevermind then...better disappear before I start messin my whole blog up ~n sooo regretting it later~

oh yeah, by the way...this post is a result of 5 hours straight orchestra rehearsals. it totally messes your "upper story" (your head). so dont mind me please...not thinking straight. heck!! i dont think I'm even thinking right now. byyyeeeeee.....

Till I recollect my wits again--->> hugz n kisses

2007-07-07T06:22:00.000-07:00

Give me something more
Than just a temporary high
I need something more
Than just a way to get by

Every turn I take
Leads me further away
Every move I make
I seem further astray

Every minute to date
I feel emptier each day
God, please not too late
How long more? Nay, nay

Give me something more
Than just a temporary high
Its probably my fault I know
I just wanna get it by

2007-07-05T01:36:00.000-07:00

I crave a change,
Any change at all...

I wanna court danger

Get out of the confines of what is "good" and "right"

Change the image of sweetness and innocence

Do something unexpected

Screw up for a change

Why is doing wrong so easy?

Why does it actually feel good?

Why should I strive to be perfect?

When I already know its impossible

Maybe I'll just be bad till the end

Isn't it easier?

Why not just enjoy life

To the fullest

The ultimate FULL

But what then is the fill?

Could I break the rules

And get away with it?

Answer me

Cuz I'm tired of doing right

Is there such a thing as that?

I highly doubt so

But here I am thinking that anyway

So what?

Actually

You know what?

I'm tired of thinking too

No such thing?

You're wrong

I'm right

I wish I wasn't

By the way

What you're reading now is crap

Totally

But I need a change

I crave something different

Something that fills the gaps

Something that satisfies

Anything

Anything at all

P/s--->>fineee...i admit I'm emo-ing rite now...

What's up??

2007-07-02T03:47:00.000-07:00

This is what's up!!! its the KLPac Sinfonietta's latest concert in conjunction with the HSBC Classics String Festival...a really BIG clear picture up there...hehe. btw, for those blur ppl out there, i'm part of the Sinfonietta. as in, i'm playing too laaa...lol. our performance will be on the 13th and 14th of July...which is a fri and sat night. we'll be playing some cool classical stuff...eg. a Haydn cello concerto, "Pomp and Circumstance March", "Masquerade", "Pizzicato Polka", and "St. Paul's Suite". Dunno what the heck I'm rambling bout?? Come then you'll know!!!! ahahaha...=P for more info just --->>click here<<--- or you could ask me bout it =)

oh yeahh...for those who are interested...there will be workshops and master classes for string players...go check out the website then you'll know. there are other concerts too like a wind quintet and a jazz trio.

Got to run now...will update as soon as some special event/happening/person/story appears to inspire me. lol

Till later--->> Hugz n kisses ^^

What do I mean to you?

2007-06-29T17:02:00.000-07:00

You say that you love me
I wonder if thats true
You say you'll never leave me
Heard that a time maybe two

You say that you miss me
Too much it reaches the moon
You say, "Baby, would you kiss me?"
Not doing that anytime soon

You say that all
And maybe much much more
But never that one right word
That would open up my door

The one thing have I asked
The one that you never say
The only thing that might heal
My scarred heart this very day

Answer me this
Only be sure its true
Tell me please, tell me this
What do I mean to you?

~~

You say that I'm beautiful
I wonder if I'm just for show
You say that you're proud of me
Only cuz of how I look?

You say that I'm your girl
Just a Show and Tell for friends?
You say that you are there for me
But really, my dear, until the end?

Am I just a toy you play
Like a game to fill a boring day?
Maybe a piece of art you display
Tomorrow thrown, but not for today

The one thing I have asked
The one that you never say
The only thing that might heal
My scarred heart this very day

Answer me this
Only be sure its true
Tell me please, tell me this
What do I mean to you?

Tell me please, answer me this
What do I mean to you?

Nothing to doooo...

2007-06-26T18:20:00.000-07:00

M	Magical
I	Inspirational
C	Controversial
H	Hairy
E	Eccentric
L	Luscious
L	Lively
E	Earthy

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

Am I cool or uncool? [CLICK]

You are Cool!

You're pretty cool! People look at you and think.. 'wow.. that person is cool!' Congratulations. Use your position wisely and teach the dorks below you a thing or two. There's nothing like recruiting a cool person.

Cool quizzes at Go-Quiz.com

Your Icecream Flavour is...Neopolitan!

You aren't satisfied with just one flavor. They say variety is the spice of life and this shines through in your Ice cream of choice! Just don't eat all the chocolate and leave the strawberry and vanilla behind!

What is your Icecream Flavour?

Find out at Go Quiz

Your Nail Polish Color is Purple

How you're unique: You are artistic and expressive

Why your style rocks: You pay special attention to color and fabrics

What this color says about you: "I'm creative and know how to take care of myself"

What Color Nail Polish Best Fits You?

Your Seduction Style: The Charismatic

You're beyond seductive, you're downright magnetic!

You life live and approach seduction on a grand scale.

You have an inner self confidence and energy that most people lack

It's these talents that make you seem extraordinary - and you truly are!

What Is Your Seduction Style?

Your Waist to Hip Ratio is 0.7

You are very curvy, with a defined waist.

How Curvy Are You?

How You Are In Love

You take a while to fall in love with someone. Trust takes time.

You give and take equally in relationships.

You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time.

You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.

You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard.

How Are You In Love?

You Are a Golden Blonde

Men see you as flirty and fun, yet deep and thoughtful
You've got all the pizzazz of a blonde...
With the intensity of a brunette

How Blonde Are You?

You Can Make 70% of Your Crushes Fall in Love With You

Your seduction skills are practically legendary. You know how to close the deal.
Just don't let someone you're really into get the better of you!
As long as you keep up your end of the flirting game, you'll get the prize at the end.

Can You Make Anyone Fall in Love With You?

What Guys Think of Your Long Straight Hair...

Sexy, desirable, and hard to please.
A girl who's so stunning that you've got them lined up around the block!

What Do Guys Think Of Your Hair?

What People Think of Your Mouth

People see you as both demanding and irresistible.
You are often the center of attention - and that's how you like it.
You are up for anything and very energetic. People sometimes propose wild ideas to you.
And who knows? Maybe you'll take them up on it. You are known to be a little freaky!

What Does Your Mouth Say About You?

Your Beauty Element is Air

You're quirky, fresh, and fashionable in a surprising way.
You have a beauty that's all your own, and it changes as quickly as the wind!

What's Your Beauty Element?

well...this is a result of acute boredom. hahahha...but amazing how true these stuff are.

till laterz--->> hugz n kisses =)

L is for LEMBU

2007-06-25T18:48:00.000-07:00

yeaahhhhh...had my 1st driving lesson yesterday. how was it???? weeeeellllll....it was BORING. uhuhh...believe it!! and why do ppl so seem to enjoy honking nervous, 1st time drivers in white lil kancils with big "L" signs posted all over??? i mean like...its a big L for LEMBU mister!!! I'm SUPPOSED to be SLOW!!! yup...my speed limit is like...60 max. how fast do ppl expect me to go???!! oh well...

so yeah, had to drive on the busy trunk road all the way to KLANG. cuz my driving instructor needed to go to the bank. (yeapz...ive changed my profession. im a DRIVER now.) and did I mention?? KLANG+LUNCH HOUR+TRUNK ROAD = freaking jammed. uhuhh...and add on a cacated car to that -the clutch pedal was super stiff- and you get a horrible cramp in your leg at the end of 2 hours. it was sweltering btw...wat do you expect? kancil air-conds aren't exactly the best, plus it was at the hottest hour of the day.

but then...I'll do ANYTHING for that darling license. simply ANYTHING...even suffering another 7 looonnnggggg lessons like that. ANYTHING for that beloved license. hehehe...yeah, I'm desperate =)

soooo...I'm having another lesson in about 10 mins. but the instructor fella is bound to be late. like...seriously. he can never be early or even on time...its against his principles. *sarcastic look*

till later--->> hugz n kisses ^^ (if i survive another lesson that is...lol)

It ain't maybe

2007-06-18T18:54:00.000-07:00

All the time
I never knew
My heart was always
Always with you

All the time
That you were here
I never realized
Just how dear you were

All the time
You were in front of me
I never realized
What I now believe to be

...That...

Baby, I love you
Yes, truly that's true
I have always loved you
I just never had a clue

Only the distance of a million miles
Revealed the precious truth
Something I should have known for months
I realize how much I miss you

Now you're not around
Hope it's not too late
To tell you what I found out
Let's make it a date

Cuz now I know
Know for sure its true
It ain't just maybe, baby
I really do love you

It ain't maybe, baby
I do love you

P/s--->> a super LARGE serving of soppyness... anyone want some??? hehehe...even if u don't I'm currently stuffing it down ur throat rite?? *cheeky smile*

Maybe...

2007-06-14T05:00:00.000-07:00

Maybe if I just sit here
Maybe if I just lie here
Maybe my heart I could hear
Beating again

Maybe if I loved again
Maybe if I forgave a friend
Maybe some fill I'll gain
For this emptiness

My heart's not lost
Maybe, maybe
Its not frozen and cold
Maybe, maybe

A part of me died
On a long, lonely night
How could I bring to life
Something that was stabbed by a knife??

My heart's not lost?
Maybe, tell me
Its not frozen and cold
Maybe, it could be

Maybe I could love again
Maybe I could forgive a friend
Maybe I will fill again
All this emptiness

Maybe I would just sit here
Maybe I would just lie here
I'm sure then my heart I would hear
Beating again

P/s--->> free verse anyone??? hehe...jz smth diff =P nt my best work tho...better stick to things I'm good at.

One Wish

2007-06-10T17:28:00.000-07:00

I can see forever
When I look in your eyes
And when you smile at me
No clouds cover my skies

If one wish I could make
One that could come true
Is to be with you always
And fall in love with you

~~
To wake in the morning
With you by my side
Going through life hand in hand
Assurance that our love hasn't died

If one wish I could make
One that could come true
Is to fall in love over again
Again and again with you

~~
'Cause you're the only one
God has made for me
And I thank Him so wonderfully
That He alone made me see...

...That if one wish I could make
One that could come true
Its only you who was made for me
And I was made for you

~~
Only one wish I need
For all my dreams to come true
Its to stay with you for all my time
And so be loved by you

One wish
Only one

~~

P/s--->> Everyone go *awwwwwwwww........!!* ahahahaa!! =P dis is as soppy as soppy can get... so sue me. lol

Seventeen??

2007-06-09T05:32:00.000-07:00

I feel OLD.......

like...really.

as in...i only got 3 more years of teen life.

only THREE.

that ain't a lot.

what to do???

before I know it I'll be actually, literally OLD...as in...60 years old.

with gray hair...or maybe NO hair (*OMG!!*)

and a ton of wrinkles all over

and saggy cheeks...probably saggy "elsewheres" too (*eewwwww!!!*)

time does fly doesn't it??

sh*t...

~~~~~~~~~~~

ok ok!! haha...time to cut the crap. 16 n 17 actually doesn't HAVE that MUCH of a difference. Probably just psychological i guess. Not that I'm actually gonna have gray hair n a ton of wrinkles overnight (I won't right??... will I??). Just that growing older is part of life -probably the part I don't totally lurvveeeee- and the fact that nothing can stop time...its kinda scary.

So how was the 1st week of being seventeen??? errmmmm....normal??? hehe..not that I actually expected any different. The best part probably is that darling driver's license I'm gonna get!! When?? errrr...soon?? I hope.

But something still nags at the corners of my mind. Its the uncertainty of the future. Of getting old. Every year that passes is a year nothing could ever bring back. Nothing. Mistakes made will always remain. Nothing can erase them. Yet...life goes on. Time cannot be stopped...neither can it be turned back.

So yeahhh....point is...life still goes on. did I mention that already?? hehe...even when you turn seventeen for once -and only once- in your life, it doesn't honor you by stopping a minute. Time waits for no one...not even the king.

Wish it would though...

Signing off-->> ~~hugs n kisses~~

Maybe if I just sit here
I would actually feel
My heart beating again
If its still there...

The Greatest Battle

2007-06-06T17:46:00.000-07:00

The greatest battle fought
Is not in the ring of clashing swords
Nor the red of blood spilled
Nor the pain of fear seared

Its not in the echoes of guns and powder
Nor in the cries of hate and power
Neither in the bygone cannons of sailing ships
Nor in ancient armies that play for keeps

Its not in the despair of jealous lovers
Nor in the thundering of army horses
Neither in the clash of shields and steel
Nor in haunting ghosts of broken deals

Its not in the sweetness of bitter revenge
Nor the heartbreak of love avenged
Tell me then the greatest battle fought
That beats time, space, and all it ought

The greatest battle fought
Is in man's mind of thought
Never was of sword or spear
But within one's soul so dear

It is all in the fight
Of what is good and right
Eternal is the battle against wrong
Beginning of forever till the end is long

Holidayzzzz...

2007-06-05T02:01:00.000-07:00

IT WAS NICEEEEEeeee.....!!

(cameron highlands I mean)

haha...fun in a totally new n different way. PLUS the weather over there is FANTASTIC!! weelllll..i guess de only thing not nice was de crazy jam (the KL ppl brought the jam allllllll de way up camerons i guess) and the water rationing. de apartments we stayed in totally ran out of water...as in, running water. at times the toilet cudnt flush cuz no water....which was just NASTY. hahaha..bt other den dat it was really relaxing n fun!! had my birthday up there...nth much...jz sum cake n frens. but it was still nice..hehe.

Btw, did i mention it was church camp??? hehe...it was. bt a really really different kinda church camp. next to no sermons or workshops or stuff like dat. mostly did lots n lots of lazing around...n PIGGING out. like...seriously...never ate so much junk in my life!! haha!

hmmm...i guess dats about all. de strawberries were DELICIOUS...as expected..hehe. bt the "T cafe" was really disappointing *haihzzz...* de food there was no where NEAR as good as it used to be.

weellll...nt really in de mood to write actually. jz wasted my WHOLE day in de stupid amali driving 6hrs thingy. like totally WASTED. all I did was sit there and wait for time to go home. how dumb can de system get?? *arghhh...* good thing i made a new fren there...n it turns out she's from Grace Klang!! its a small small world aint it?? hehe...anywayz, dats all for now i guess.

Till I'm in a better writing mood --->> ~hugz n kisses~

Goodbye, Sweet Sixteen!!

2007-05-28T18:06:00.000-07:00

Sweet sixteen
Never again
Goodbye childhood
I'll never see you again

The border was crossed
Unknown to my eyes
Just a lil sentimental
While I'm saying my goodbyes

But gonna spread my wings
Now I'm gonna fly
Left the past behind
Its all flashing by

My Future, you're welcome
Here with open arms
Nothing can stop me now
Look out world, here I come!

P/s--->> *ahem ahem* hint hint?? haha...wats the date nxt saturday??

Mondays...sigh

2007-05-28T00:39:00.000-07:00

I hate Mondays...

Especially rainy Mondays
After nice, sunny Sundays...

Wish it was still Sunday...

Now I have to get through the week
Starting all over again
Till Friday comes with the promise of fun
And the Weekend I'll greet with open arms...

But then Monday comes again
That dratted Monday begins
When my mood is gloomier than the sky
And I wonder how in the world to get by
When all I wanna do is curl up in bed
Seeming to all the world like I'm dead
Dreaming dreams of Weekends past
Hoping that Friday will soon come fast

Mondays...*sigh*...Mondays

I hate Mondays

Dreamland

2007-05-22T18:15:00.000-07:00

If only I didn't have to wake
To face another day
If forever I could close my eyes
And dream my troubles away

Run away to Dreamland
Where wishes do come true
Where hurts can be locked away
And cats are shades of blue

Far away in Dreamland
Where decisions are never made
No tears allowed but tears of joy
And villians end up dead

Fly away to Dreamland
Far from the worries here
Anything you want could actually come true
Anything at all, my dear

If only I didn't have to wake
To face a brand new day
If forever I could escape
To Dreamland far, far away

The bad bad game

2007-05-22T04:23:00.000-07:00

I played a game
A very bad bad game
Some call it naughty
For me, a lil dame

Its called love
Puppy love if you like
Never was serious to me
Simple as flying a kite

But it turned out more
Yeap, much much more
Till it overwhelmed me
Ushering reason out the door

So I played it on
That bad bad game
And now my heart
Got lost in the bargain

How do I get it back?
Where do lost hearts go?
Mommy tell me please
I just have to know

I'm sorry I was naughty
I was a bad bad girl
I didn't mean to loose it
I'll find it soon I'm sure

Now I won't play that game
That bad bad game
I've learnt my lesson
And I'm full of shame

P/s--->> sum lil girl spice??? haha

Oh no!!!

2007-05-21T19:43:00.000-07:00

Oh no!
What do I do?
I stole someone's heart
But I never meant to

Well that's bad
That's real real bad
I guess I asked for it
Playing around as I had

My delima now
Is someone's heart to break
Am I as cruel as that?
The very answer I dread

Wish I didn't flirt around
Going on as I did
But never in my wildest thoughts
It would have ended like this

Now I need a way out
Don't wanna hurt no one
But I'm afraid its rather late
The damage has been done

Oh no!
What do I do?
I stole someone's heart
But I never meant to

...I'm sorry...

P/s-->> haha...didnt steal no one's heart ok??

Live through tomorrow

2007-05-20T18:18:00.000-07:00

I have to live through tomorrow
I have to will to live
Even if sunshine I have to borrow
I know I have to believe

Though clouds may come
To shadow my day
Though winds may blow
Obstacles in my way

Though the flowers bloom
No longer for me or you
Though sliver linings turn
And everything looks greyish blue

Though my heart breaks
Maybe into two
Though memories haunt
And nightmares come true

Though I'm left alone
Without a single clue
Though Love deserts
Without a lil goodbye too

I have to live through tomorrow
I have to will to live
Even if sunshine I have to borrow
I know I have to believe

P/s---> its a continuation of de lil verse in my last post

My deep fried brains

2007-05-18T05:41:00.000-07:00

I CANT WRITE ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and that sucks so bad........so so bad

Not to mention, its positively infuriating. i wanna write...it sumhow became a vent for my emotions. bt nothing seems to b turning out right. nothing seems to even RHYME right. i jz dont get it...where in de world did my inspiration go to?? or are my brains still recovering from the frying it got that day?? argghh!!

life. what would we do without it...bt what would we do WITH it. haihzz...for me rite now...its jz one big complicated mess. i cant seem to b doing the things i should actually be doing...i jz dont get it. why cant i do what i know i should do?? why dont i have the drive to do what i love to do most?? doesnt make sense...at all. bt i guess most of life doesnt make any particular sense ritee?? ah weellll...life will be life. ANNNNDDDDD...i hv no idea wat im crapping about rite now. so i think i shud go...hehe.

I have to live though tomorrow
I have to will to live
Even if sunshine I have to borrow
I know I have to believe

till nxt time--->> hugz n kisses!

P/s--->> weeelllll...i guess i DID manage to make smth rhyme. haha

The 1st step to FREEDOM!!!

2007-05-14T01:21:00.000-07:00

*ahem ahem* hehe...the 1st step to driverhood i mean. i passed my undang test!!! wohooooo!!!! its over....FINALLY. n it wasnt that bad actually...nt as easy as sum ppl make it to b...bt its handle-able...hehe. got 46/50..nt bad riteeee??

wellllll...nw all i gt to do is de actual driving stuff. wish me luck ^^ oh yeaaaa...almost forgot. hv to go n listen to another 6 hrs of crap. {{...sh*t...}}

hvnt been in de right frame of mind lately for poem writing. probably my brains got sumwhat fried with the fever last week...or was it last last week?? *scratches head* ANYwayzzz..point is...i cant seem to write anything post-able. nt dat i actually found the time to TRY but...lol *cheeky smile*

gtg now...
till nxt time--->> ~hugz n kisses~

I don't believe, in fairy tales

2007-05-06T17:32:00.000-07:00

All perfect?
Never happens
Fairy tales?
Simply nonsense

Perfect soulmate?
Give me a break
Forever?
More like never

I don't believe
In fairy tales
I'm a lil too old
For bedtime tales

Don't come telling me
About forever
Cuz fairy tales
Always come out never

Almost perfect
Was where I was
Till fate turned my life
And everything I lost

I'm a big girl now
Don't give me that crap
Fairy tales come true?
You know that's just drab

I don't believe
In fairy tales
I'm a lil too old
For bedtime tales

True about you

2007-05-06T06:06:00.000-07:00

When a smile
Isn't really a smile
When a laugh
Is less than a bluff

When a "hi!"
Comes out as forced
Makes you wonder
If life's coated with frost

Are we all masks?
Then life's a masquerade
Are we all players
In this game of charades?

Cuz nothing is
As it seems to be
We come and go
Hidden, it seems to me

Nothing showing
All out of sight
Pulling on daily masks
That stick with frightful might

What is real?
What then is true?
Show me something
True about you

Life cannot be
Just a masquerade
Just empty faces
A game of charades

So show me something
True about you
That I may believe
What I know to be true

The truth about you

sick SiCk SICK!!!

2007-05-04T05:39:00.000-07:00

aihzzz...almost forgot wat its like to be sick. n of ALL times to be sick de stupid sickness decided to attack during de BUSIEST week of the whole month!!! irritating...arrgghh!

so yeaaa...here i am, hving so many things to do, so many appointments, all one after another...n im SICK!! so i hv to drag myself around, n pysch myself into being well ( "no michelle, no no, ur NOT sick u hear?? NOT sick...ur WELL!!" *im so not kidding...i actually did that!*). well...all in all, i jz wish this fever+ flu+ cough+ headache+ i dunno wat else chose a more...errmm...appropriate(??) time to visit. shud hv made an appointment with me 1st...to visit during my free-er days.

aiyahh...nothin i can do bout it now. bt jz to pray n hope it finishes its visit by tmr...gt a hectic day n no way im gonna last with dis splitting headache (which makes me wonder if brains are actually of any use being so knotted up). not to mention my burned out internal thermostat which rapidly alternates between freezing cold and sweltering heat...forcing me to carry around tons of "winter wear". yeahhh...WINTER wear in MALAYSIA. dats how crazy my insides are. wtd...blehhh...

fine finee...im done complaining. no energy left to type.

--->> till my guts get straightened out~~ signing off~~

**hugz n kisses**
Michelle

Who Have I Become?

2007-04-28T23:43:00.000-07:00

Oh God
Who have I become?
Look at me
What have I done

I became the person
I hated the most
Did the same things
I despised a host

What came over me
To make me do such?
How do I regain
Something worth so much?

Tell me please
The cold, hard truth
Spare me nothing
I just need some proof

That all's not lost
That I'm the same inside
Not the monster I see
Beneath that coy smile outside

Or is it gone
The girl I once knew
Buried under hurt
Afraid of pain anew

Help me please
I can't bear the guilt
Mercy, come wash away
The black empire I built

Oh God
Who have I become?
I'm so scared
Can this be undone?

Cuz I don't know
Who I have become

P/s---->> dun go thinkin nothing...lol.

Blue skies broken

2007-04-26T19:09:00.000-07:00

Will my dream
Ever be reality?
What had become
Of my lovely fantasy?

The illusion never changed
Into something real
I was barely hoping
That this was the right deal

Now I'm alone
Me, myself and I
Broken to the core
Torn up on the floor

What went wrong?
I'm in a daze
I just found myself
Caught up in this maze

My fantasy shattered
Blue skies broken
The stars hid their faces
Despair was woken

Trust, never again
Hope, I must disdain
Dreams, cause much pain
Faith, my only gain

...Blue skies were broken
My deep despair woken...

I need something

2007-04-20T03:22:00.000-07:00

I need something
To make me complete
There's something missing
Its something I need

Cuz when I'm alone
When silence sets in
When all voices stop
Only whisperings of the wind

That's when I feel it
The emptiness inside
The void of a thousand years
My soul it divides

Is there more to life
Than this empty token?
Like clinging on to a rope
That's about to be broken

Save me! Help me!!
I don't care who at all
The silence it tortures me
Like blows from a wrecking ball

Show me the way
To fill this void
Need I happiness or virtue?
Love or should I avoid?

I don't care how
I don't care who
I need to feel I'm full
Anything at all I'll do

Cuz I need something
To make me complete
There's something missing
No idea what's it that I need

God help me

P/s --->> no worries!! lol...im nt really writing about me

Music of the Heart

2007-04-16T01:11:00.000-07:00

Music that lives
Alive with emotion
Touches hearts
Sets into motion

Music that makes
Grown men weep
Softens hard hearts
Plunges in deep

Music that crosses
Every barrier
Of language or color
Of nation or carrier

Music that's felt
With pure, divine love
Nothing in between
As sweet as a dove

That's the music
I wanna play
The music that lives
Forever and a day

Cuz I believe in music
Music from the heart
Worth more than gems or gold
Is music of the heart

...Music of the Heart...

Just loving you

2007-04-15T01:06:00.000-07:00

It happened so fast
All in a blink of an eye
I was just driving along
Never expected to die

But I guess my time was up
Had to answer Death's call
I know the pain I've caused
The tears, loneliness and all

I'm so sorry my dear
I couldn't keep my promise
To take care and love you
For always and always

Death parted us too soon
We didn't have enough time
But no worries, just remember this
Your heart will still be mine

So live you life
We'll be together sometime
When its your turn to come
Here where no clock marks time

I'm sorry, my sweetheart
I just had to go
But don't worry, I'll still be here
You may not see me though

You know that
I'll miss you
But I'll always
Be with you

I'll never stop
Just loving you
So don't stop
Loving me too

P/s its kinda a sequel to --->>"Anything"<<--- (one of my old posts). its the other side of the story...as in...de fella who died-ed. lolx

"No-one-loves-my-poems Syndrome"

2007-04-11T19:07:00.000-07:00

uhuhhh...no one reads dem anywayz...so why should I keep on posting?? welll...besides de 1 or 2 ppl i noe who really appreciate dem. n actually COMMENT. so i think I'll quit posting 4 de time being. should I?? no one cares anyway...riteee??? I dun even noe who actually visits my blog. besides beloved "kuku case" (big big hugzzz!!) and mayb sum other occational visitors....*sob sobzzz*

THE POINT IS............please please please drop a comment or smth in my chatbox so I'll noe SOMEONE actually reads my stuff (or crap...whichever applies). i dun care if i dun noe you at all...total stranger who happened to find my blog...nevermind. as long as SOMEPPL other den ermmmm...pauline?? wesley?? michelle ooi?? (i think dats all)...reads here. okkkkk??? deal??? so leave a trace when ur here. anonymousity doesnt matter. just leave a trace...lol. I'm kinda desperate...I'll admit dat. hehe...

please please pleaseeeee....if not I'll go thinking I'm a useless writer *soobbbbzzzz*

lots of luv--->> Michelle =)

fineeee....also admit I'm kinda emo rite now. doesnt mean I dont mean wat I jz said...

Wondering about you

2007-04-08T00:21:00.000-07:00

...A letter to the future "love of my life"...

Dearest,

I was just wondering
Who would you be?
How would you look like?
Would you really love me?

I was just wondering
If you were short or tall
Charming or funny
Both or not at all

I was just wondering
Where you are right now
Whether far or near
Have I seen you before?

I was just wondering
When I would meet you
Where? How? Who?
So many questions, nothing new

I was just wondering
How would I know its you?
But I guess there's no answer
At the right time I'll just do

I was just wondering
If you were wondering too
When our paths will cross
And love will lead me to you

I was just wondering
Just wondering...

Wondering about you

Three wishes...

2007-04-06T20:23:00.000-07:00

If I had three wishes...

I would wish
We never had met
I never saw your face
Together we never sat

If I had three wishes...

I would wish
Time could be turned
Fate could be erased
The past could be burned

If I had three wishes...

I would wish
For neither riches nor wealth
Long life nor peace
Everlasting joy nor health

If I had three wishes...

I would only wish
That you could be here
And I could loose myself
In your gaze so crystal clear

Forever, my dear
Forever so near

P/s sorry paulineeee!!!! hehe...its her idea actually. you can read her post here --->>Click here<<--- stole her idea cuz it ws so ingenious!!! lol..bt changed it to suit my kinda style =P (hope you dont mind gurllll...hehe)

Never really loved you anyway

2007-04-05T18:24:00.000-07:00

You walked in
Right into my life
Then walked out
Stabbing me like a knife

You started it
Then brought it to an end
But I don't care anyway
I don't give a damn

Cuz...

I never really loved you anyway
Was lucky that it stayed this way
Now there's nothing left to say
Don't think you loved me, it's okay

Cuz I never really loved you anyway

Am I hurt?
I'm not really sure
When you walked
Out that door my dear

You started it
Then brought it to an end
But I don't care anyway
I don't give a damn

Cuz...

I never really loved you anyway
Was lucky that it stayed this way
Now there's nothing left to say
Don't think you loved me, it's ok

Cuz I never really loved you anyway

~~~~

Wait, who am I kidding here?
I did love you once, you hear?
But never thought it'll be this way
You never loved me anyway

P/s--->> jz tryin smth diff..hehe

Friend Test

2007-04-03T23:47:00.000-07:00

heyyaa!!

Just made a "friend test" n its on my sidebar. go check it out k??? good way to noe who REALLY noes me...muuahhahaha*evil villain laugh* =P no worries...ill still luv u even if u get 0%. hahaha...or maybe not *cheeky smile*

more poems?? sry...too mixed up last few days to write anything post-able. or rather...nything that wont destroy my "gud girl" image. hahaha...got a clue?? nvrmind...dun even noe wat im crappin. hehe...laterzz...

*muakzz*

-->Michelle<--

Can you...??

2007-04-01T00:59:00.000-07:00

Can you feel lonely
Surrounded by people?

Can you feel empty
When life's at the fullest?

Can you love to do something
But not have the heart to do it?

Can you believe in yourself
But not have the confidence needed?

Can you feel broken up
When everything was just fixed?

Can you love someone
But hate the same person?

Can you want to remember something
But try your best to forget?

...Cuz I can...

~~~~~~~~~

A kiss
Isn't called a kiss
Till you can touch
The inmost heart

Love
Is never called love
Till someone could break
Your mended heart

...Love...

~~~~~~~~~

P/s--->> ooopsss...hehe. sry in a emo mood...

Impossible

2007-04-01T00:10:00.000-07:00

I see my dreams
The light at the tunnel's end
I see my future here
Coming just around the bend
I can touch it
I can feel the sucess
All I really need
Is faith at the very best

My dreams shine
Bigger than reality
More than I'll ever hope for
But I sincerely believe...

~~~~~

That to have faith
Nothing is impossible
I'll reach for the sky
Don't say its not practical
No holding fears
Could ever hold me back
Cuz I'm breaking free
To do the impossible

Never say its impossible

~~~~~

Don't tell me now
To stop aiming for the moon
Don't tell me now
You'll never reach the stars soon
Cuz I know my God
Can do the impossible
It's as simple as that
Anything is possible

My dreams shine
Bigger than reality
More than I'll ever hope for
But I sincerely believe...

~~~~~

That to have faith
Nothing is impossible
I'll reach for the sky
Don't say its not practical
No holding fears
Could ever hold me back
Cuz I'm breaking free
To do the impossible

Don't tell me its impossible...

~~~~~

Will you?

2007-03-31T04:40:00.000-07:00

I feel the butterflies

Fluttering inside me
My mind often wanders about
What could this be?
I see you in the distance
My heart misses a beat
Just a touch of your hand
Oh, I feel the heat

What's it called?
I think it's love
Am I mistaken?
No, I think it's love

Cuz nothing has
Ever felt so right
When I'm with you
My world's just so bright
The only problem left
Is with you my dear
Love me too, will you?
That I wanna hear

If only you would
Look at me that way
And say those lovely things
I so want you to say
If only you could
Feel the same butterflies
Do love me, would you?
Oh, I'll be soaring sky high

What's it called?
I think it's love
Am I mistaken?
No, I think it's love

Cuz nothing has
Ever felt so right
When I'm with you
My world's just so bright
The only problem left
Is with you my dear
Love me too, will you?
That I wanna hear

Just love me too...
Will you??
Do say so my dear

P/s---->> *ahem ahemmm* i am NOT in love. please take note of that...hehe. DO NOT jump into conclusions watsoever. if you reallllyyy are so curious as to where i got dis inspiration then...lets jz say i was watching Cinderella 3 =P hahaha...kiddy i noe.

Pick up the pieces

2007-03-28T23:03:00.000-07:00

Pick up the pieces
There's nothing left
Of what we used to be
Before you packed up and left

Even the pain is gone
The hurt had said goodbye
Nothing left but memories
Of a lifetime ago gone by

How I tried
To cling to the past
Re-live those sweet memories
That seemed to fly by so fast

But it slipped through my fingers
Everything we once shared
Absolutely nothing is left
Just a shadow I once cared

Its time to move on
Forget the long lost kisses
Cuz there is nothing left
Just pick up the pieces

P/s ---->> its just pure imagination ok??? im not pointing fingers at anyone or anything. if you persist in thinking its about u.....go get a life!! hehe

The Evening

2007-03-28T18:20:00.000-07:00

To paint a picture

With nothing but words...

The sun bade farewell
Painting the sky vivid hues
The clouds were tinted red
Yellows, purples, maybe a bit of blues

Birds frolicked on the horizon
On the way home to their nest
They said goodnight to a day well spent
Eager to give their wings some rest

The strange light bathed
The world in colorful array
For just a moment time
Minutes and seconds seem to sway

Clouds floated lazily
Never in a rush or hurry
As the big ball of fire crept
Toward horizon's line without tarry

Yes, the Evening is here
Proclaming the Night to come
Heralding the stars and the moon
Saying, "Hark! Hark! Here they come."

Who's that girl?

2007-03-26T23:03:00.000-07:00

Mirror, mirror

Who's that girl?
Standing before me
Her hair all in curls

Mirror, mirror
That's not me
I don't know her
Who could she be?

There's no way
She is my reflection
It's not possible
Down to the definition

I know I'm different
My heart tells me I am
But I guess it never shows
Its a front for all of them

I'm not hard and tough
Pretty soft on the inside
The Ice Queen is just an act
My heart is breakable in fact

I'm not the person
Everyone thinks I am
Mirror, when will you show
The girl I truly am?

Mirror, mirror
Who's that girl?
Will I ever see
My true self unfurl?

Anything

2007-03-25T23:54:00.000-07:00

All I want

Is to feel you near
All I need
Is your listening ear

All I pray for
That you could be here
With me now
Your loving whispers so crystal clear

I'll do anything
Just to have you here
I'll say anything
Your voice I need to hear

If only Time
Could erase itself
Fate, will you trade?
I'll sacrifice myself

Just to have
You returned to me
I'll gladly die in your place
So your sweet smile I'll see

There's nothing
I wouldn't do
To hear you say again
"I love you too"

To feel your lips
Pressed against mine
To have your hands
Warmly enveloping mine

No danger
Would be too great
If it brings
You back from the grave

The pain's killing
Won't you ever come?
Please say you will

I need you
I love you
I miss you

...come back to me...

P/s goodnezzz...soppy!! and sad too!! *sobz sobz* but dun worry...nobody died recently or smth...hehehe. pure imagination =)

heyya peeps!!

2007-03-22T23:57:00.000-07:00

yupyup...i've totally changed all the colors in my blog. more pinky dun u think?? hehe...tell me wat u think k?? is dis better??or de last 1?? your comments wil b greatly appreciated...or ermm...mayb not =P

updates?? sorry...kinda bz at dis moment with my performances n all. my head is occupied with nth but ORCHESTRA music at de moment (arrrgghhh!!) n i cant get it out so....no space for poetic inspirations...hahaha. promise ill cook up a really nice poem when i hv de chance...pinky promise.

gt to run nw...hv another performance tonite n i take ages to get ready...hehe.

signing off---->> with lots of luv, Mich =)

oh yea! btw... i hvnt changed de font colors of sum of my older posts so it may b a lil hard to read dem. sowreee!!

sob sobzzz

2007-03-20T04:38:00.000-07:00

She felt the rain trickle slowly down her face, mixing with her tears. But she felt nothing else. Nothing at all. She didn't care what people were thinking. She didn't care who was staring as she stood in the pouring rain. All she cared about was that the love of her life had been snatched away in a moment. Her beloved. The only one she had ever loved.
Her eyes, red with crying, stood stood out starkly against the deathly pallor of her finely chiseled features. Not a sound escaped her lips, but her heart was screaming in distress. The same question haunted her thoughts, over and over again. "Why, God? Why him? Why, out of all the people in the world, did You have to take HIM from me?". She was angry. Angry with fate. Angry with God. And angry with herself.

Less than an hour had passed since that dreadful phone call reporting that horrible accident, but the pain made it seem like forever. The aching pain in the pit of her stomach. The pain that worsened with every passing second. The pain that first set in when she realized he was gone, forever. Never again will she feel his caressing touch, his warm loving kisses. Never again could she run to him in times of trouble to hear his assurance that everything will be alright. Never again will she see that boyish grin she loved. Never again could she love another. Never again, never again.

The cold wind whipped around her mercilessly as the rain continued drenching her from top to bottom. The freezing water collected in puddles that licked around her bare ankles. But the cold hand that gripped her on the inside was far worse than the chill on the outside. The cold grip that could never be warmed. But only the cold could numb the wrenching pain deep in her heart. Slowly she turned and headed for home. But where was home without the welcoming arms of the man she loved?

p/s uhuhhh....haha. my 1st attemt at prose, not poetry. wanna noe the moral of de story?? DONT DRINK AND DRIVE!! hahahaha....lame i noe =P jz kidding...

A New Day

2007-03-15T23:27:00.000-07:00

I see a ray of light
Creeping over the horizon
The past is left behind
The future dawns without binds

Yes, a new day has begun...

A brand new start has come
No longer can my past hold me back
Its a new day thats here to stay
Nothing can stop that fact

Forget the darkness
Forget the night of the past...

For starting now
Starting here
A new day has begun
A brand new start has come

IT'S BACKKKKKK!!!!

2007-03-15T02:42:00.000-07:00

yayyyyy!!! *fireworks n cheers* woohoooooo!!! itssss baccckkkk!!!!!!!!!

*ahem ahem* hehe...*calms myself* yeapzz..its back. 4 real. haha...my inspiration i mean. n i hope it plans to stay 4 good dis time. n not desert me suddenly-- making me go nuts with worry wondering whether it'll b back soon...hahaha. *sigh* it feels goooooddddd...=P

Welcome back, my precious

How much I've missed you
Now do stay on right here with me
Don't go awandering anymore you fool

Wait a min
I'm not talking to YOU
Don't so perasan please
Thinking I haven't got a clue

I'm talking to my darling inspiration
And that is all thank you
What else do you think I'll miss?? some guy??
Oh PUHLEESSEEE...no way!! there's none new

hahahhahaa...i noe...im nuts =P ehehehee....its MY blog anywayz *cheeky smile*

signing of --->> hugs n kisses!!

Just a word

2007-03-15T02:25:00.000-07:00

Just a word
Has broken my life
Left me for dead
Filled me with dread

Just a word
Tore me to pieces
It cut deep into
Both heart and soul too

Just a word
Killed me inside
Choked every breath of air
Left me here in deep despair

Just a word
Has hurt me so much
Cuz it was from you
You, whom I called my friend too

I never ever realized
Just a word could kill
Till you came, my dearest friend
To make me meet my very end

P/s chill ppl!! dun worry...it definitely aint bout u. jz let my imagination go wild a lil...hehe

Freedom

2007-03-13T20:21:00.000-07:00

I can almost taste the freedom
That lies on the outside world
The breath of pure liberty
So indescribably it unfurls

I long for independence
To be free from every rule
I long for privacy
So to myself I can be truly true

I need my own space
To do what i really wanna do
I can't stand the many constraints
All the no-s, cannot-s, and don't do-s

I feel so caged up
Like a bird needing to fly
I wanna be free to be myself
Not who the world expects
When they see for themselves

...I wanna be free...

Heyhey!!

2007-03-12T23:57:00.000-07:00

been quite a while since i last updated. n nope...inspiration hsnt returned yet. aihhhzzzz....*moment of silence*... desperately hoping its jz temporary *sobsobzz*

on the other hand...LIFE'S GREAT!!! hehe...4 nw dat is. a lil stressful with my concert coming up so soon...bt otherwise its cool. a perfect balence between bz n relaxing...haha. bet most of u ppl r SOOOOO jealous im nt in school nymore *cheeky smile*. bt my brains r gona b seriously rusty by de time i get into college...hahaha. jz realized dat day i hvnt been studyin for 6 mths straight....goodnezzzz!! wait a min...wats 2+2 again??? 6 rite??? =P

as for my concert...for those who dunno yet (ketinggalan zaman la u!!! hehe) its on de 22, 23, 24, n 25 of march. its Mozart's "The Magic Flute"...an awesome opera. n will b held at KLPac (Kuala Lumpur Performance Arts Center). my orchestra will b playing with the soloist(i think they're professional singers) and urs truly will b playin violin. it aint really expensive...for a classical concert...n wil b a great experience so....comeeee!! hahaha... contact me for more details la. i think i cud even get tickets at student price which is only RM30...only!!! lol...btw, there r nite concerts as well as day matinées too.

gtg now... hopefully, prayerfully my precious inspiration wil come back asap. n i jz remembered!!! i HAVE to write sumthing soon...sum1 ordered. haha...yupyup, my poems r for order too. cool rite?? hehe...tata for now!! *muakiezz*

For through all trails,
Through darkness till the coming morn,
Peace and calm is found,
In the "Eye of the Storm"...